Top of my Leunig bucket list would probably be fighting a bushfire, but here is a list of items also worthy of honourable mention:
• Necropsy an elephant that had been dead for two days in 33oC heat, while surrounded by a million flies.
• Perform a foetotomy in similar environmental conditions. A foetotomy involves cutting up a dead, usually decomposed, calf while it is still inside the mother. Very tricky and the stink doesn’t leave you for days and days and days. Not so good if you have a dinner party invitation.
• Euthanase anybody’s much loved pet.
• Go back to primary school and experience all the bullying from kids and beatings from teachers that involved.
• Fly. This one is particularly difficult considering many of the things I love to do involve overseas travel.
• Go to a funeral, particularly my own.
• Be a teenager again.
• Eat asparagus and Vegemite.
• Visit Spain.
• Worry about tipping: how much, should I, shouldn’t I?
• Watch a reality TV show.
• Go to the opera.
• Be asked what I am thinking (because it is too embarrassing to admit that I am not really thinking anything at all).
Dr. F. Bunny